I often feel that I am living in the ‘Rear Window’ of a Hitchcock film. For me, the Internet is like a telescope in the hands of the film’s protagonist, allowing me to observe the lives of others. Well, my life is also being observed by others. Wait a minute, ‘Observe’? Maybe that doesn’t seem to be an accurate word. Well, let me put it another way – we consciously expose our lives to others through the Internet.
We’re presenting our own highlight reel
That’s the charm of the internet! In real life, we have much less capacity to control what others think of us. Whereas online, we only need to put the information we want to be seen!
Even though I’m not an internet celebrity with millions of followers, I still care how and what I present about my life. I admit, that I spend more time choosing photos to post and carefully formulating captions to make my life seem more interesting or organized than it is. I would post beautiful views from my travels, but I wouldn’t talk about the arguments I had with my partner during the journey. I would post a photo of a peaceful sunset, but I wouldn’t post about the anxiety I felt that morning.
I think, deep down, we all run our online lives in this way. Moreover, we control the narrative and present our embellished and filtered selves. It’s not necessarily dishonest, but it’s not the full story either. Because we want to show off the good moments to others and quietly sweep the struggles under the carpet.
Selling the life of your dreams
In addition to this, we also pay attention to the lives of others on display. Whether it’s a lavish party for the wealthy or a busy white-collar life, in these types of vlogs, I often see comments like – ‘I hope my life will be like this one day.’
For me, one of the internet influencers I used to follow was Li Ziqi. Unlike many influencers who focus on glamour, luxury, or fast city life, Li showcases the serenity and isolation of country living. Moreover, she has never sold a product in her video compared to others who promote various adverts for brands, beauty products, or luxury goods often. Her world is just like a dream, strolling through misty forests, gathering wild vegetables, and weaving baskets. I remember the first time I watched her video, I was completely captivated by the sense of peace. For a moment, I believed deep down inside that I could live a life like that.
Later then I realized that Li may not be selling a designer brand or any product, but something else – a dream, a dream of a slower, calmer life. In particular, it’s appealing to those who spend their days overwhelmed by work, social obligations, and endless notifications.
Despite her advocacy of simple living, her content remains well-edited. I began to wonder: what don’t we see in her videos? Every photograph is perfectly composed, with perfect lighting that shows no signs of the challenges that country life inevitably brings. As a result, we can’t see in them the exhaustion of having farmed or the frustration of a failed project. We saw only the best, the most beautiful side of it.
It was then that I realized that from that perspective, she is no different from others. Whether they’re bragging about a tropical holiday or a quiet day in the mountains like Li, they’re all planning their lives for their followers. Those lives make us yearn, desire, admire, and envy…
As someone who spends time scrolling through social media, I know this feeling too well. It’s easy to start feeling like you’re falling behind when you’re constantly seeing other people’s awesome moments. You see their perfect holidays, their perfect relationships, their perfect lives. It can make you question your own life. Even though I know that everyone is carefully crafting their dynamics just like I am, sometimes I still feel sad.
But on the other hand, when I look back at my social media, I see years of great moments that I presented. Once again, I feel like it’s not just about impressing others – sometimes it’s about creating a version of my life that I want to believe in myself. Perhaps it’s like that saying, ‘Fake it till you make it,’ which for me is ‘Show it till I make it.’
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