In recent years, a linguistic shift has taken place: the language once confined to incel (involuntary celibate) communities has increasingly begun to be used in other spaces. What was once considered niche, toxic rhetoric within certain online subcultures is now increasingly being used in the wider community of the internet. This linguistic shift raises important questions about how language evolves, what it reflects about societal norms, and the potential dangers of normalizing harmful ideologies.
The Incel Subculture: A Brief Overview
The term “incel” was initially used to describe individuals who struggle to form romantic or sexual relationships, often citing societal or personal barriers to intimacy. The term was coined by a woman looking to find some support and community online sharing her struggle with finding a partner. However the term was appropriated by certain male-dominated online communities (mostly on 4chan) that are characterized by misogyny, frustration, and resentment towards women. Within these spaces, language often becomes weaponized, framing women as gatekeepers to sex and equating romantic rejection with societal injustice.
Below you will find a link to a BBC article about the woman who coined the term.
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-45284455
Incel discourse is laced with terms like “Chad” and “Stacy” to refer to conventionally attractive men and women respectively, while terms like “beta” and “alpha” are used to describe perceived hierarchies of male worth. Phrases like “blackpill” and “redpill” refer to different incel worldviews with the former suggesting a pessimistic, nihilistic outlook on relationships and society, while the latter originates from the movie “The Matrix” to describe the act of awakening to certain “truths” about gender and power dynamics (which is especially funny since the movie is stated by the makers to be an allegory for their own experiences as transgender women). These terms, born from the frustrations of this subculture, have slowly filtered into the lexicon of the rest of the internet, and thereby into larger society.
How Incel Language Has Spread
The crossover of incel terminology into more mainstream conversations can be explained by several factors. First, the increasing role of social media in shaping cultural dialogue has created spaces where fringe ideologies can gain traction. Platforms like Reddit, Twitter (X is a dumb name, sue me), and 4chan have allowed niche communities to find each other and spread their views, which can then influence larger conversations. Additionally, the rise of internet slang and shorthand phrases in online discourse has made it easier for incel terminology to slip into common use. Terms like “Chad” and “blank-maxxing” are catchy, memorable, and often used ironically, which makes them more likely to be adopted by individuals who may not fully understand their toxic roots. Another contributing factor is the growing polarization in online debates about gender, sexuality, and power. As conversations around “alpha” and “beta” males, or the so-called “redpill” mentality, increasingly appear in the context of political or cultural discussions, the language associated with incels begins to normalize. This normalization occurs when terms that were once deeply linked to misogyny are used casually, without the same level of critical examination.
Below is an example of a relatively popular meme format that was born from the spread of incel language
The Dangers of Normalizing Incel Language
The increasing use of incel language in everyday conversations is not without its dangers. These terms, though often used ironically or as memes, can reinforce harmful stereotypes about gender and relationships. For example, referring to someone as a “Chad” or an “alpha male” can perpetuate shallow, reductive views of beauty and worth. The widespread use of terms like “redpill” can unintentionally legitimize the misogynistic views that underlie them. When such terms are used without understanding their history or implications, it creates an environment where toxic masculinity and sexist views about women are more likely to be accepted or even celebrated, which is something that we unfortunately see more and more on the internet.
Moving Forward
As incel language becomes more common in popular culture, it’s essential to approach these terms with critical awareness. Language has the power to shape thoughts, beliefs, and actions. When harmful ideas are casually incorporated into everyday speech, they can normalize toxic ideologies, allowing them to spread unchecked. This can and has led to real harm such as the shooting comitted by self proclaimed incel Elliot Roger in 2014
The first step toward combating this is through education and understanding the origins of incel terminology and questioning the implications of its use in casual or serious conversations. Ultimately, it is good to be mindful about the language we use and how it can reinforce or challenge harmful ideologies. As the line between fringe subcultures and mainstream discourse continues to blur, our responsibility to engage with language thoughtfully and critically becomes more and more important.
Thanks for caring about this issue! Honestly, I’m pretty pessimistic. I feel like it’s just fueling more misogynistic attitudes and pressuring men to keep up a kind of dominant, hyper-masculine image. And with algorithms online, things can get polarized quickly, which only makes this gender divide worse and reduces the chance for real conversations between men and women.
Such an important topic! It’s easy to catch ourselves automatically adopting new vocabularies online just because they’re trendy, without stopping to think for a second about the deeper ideologies and meanings they hold. Unfortunately, it really does seem like misogynistic attitudes keep being reinforced.
This was so insightful, I never thought about it before. I do think that nowadays with the rapid changes of trend and slangs, it is inevitable that every other day we came across languages that we don’t even know the meaning of. Most important thing is that we talk about it and keep bring up details people might have overlooked. Optimistically speaking, I do feel like as a society we can still drive people to be more mindful.
Thank you for talking about this topic, the most important thing we can do to get ahead of this is a critical approach, just like you said. Sometimes I feel really pessimistic when I see certain posts and the way people talk online, seeing how normalized and widespread this kind of language has become in certain parts of the internet. Especially as it seems to be getting more and more common in popular culture, it’s easy to feel like there’s no hope, just ignoring it and scrolling. However, I do believe we could make a difference, no matter how small, by being mindful of the language we use ourselves and calling people out when we have to.
Very interesting and relevant blog. Like you said, this language used to be part of niche groups. I suppose that as the use of the internet has spread widely, these terms spilled over to other parts. I immediately start thinking of things like those male lead right-wing podcasts that essentially use the same language and hold the same beliefs. I think of it as incels but re-packaged. Instead of the image of the “loser” boy, they create an image of “successful alpha men” that is more attractive to many young men. The same message, same medium, but different aesthetic. The popularity of that type of content is somwthing that I imagien as having played a big role in all this.