As I discussed in my previous article about my encounter with Chinese live-stream influencers, it seems that the dodgy Instagram reels algorithm has become my new gateway into the wide world of niche influencer content I would normally never consume.
A recent source of fascination for me has been the many dimensions of what can be termed ‘traditional femininity’ content: ‘homemakers’, ‘stay at home girlfriends’ or proponents of ‘divine femininity’. Most of these influencers are young, white, Western women, often in their early twenties and sometimes with several children preaching on social media about the benefits of embracing women’s ‘innate’ femininity. That the modern push for gender equality had distanced women away from their ‘true calling’: raising children and making a home.
It puzzled me that these ‘traditional’ women influencers seemed to be doing majority of the patriarchy’s heavy lifting in terms of ‘encouraging’ women back to the home; a role we can say has consistently and historically been filled by conservative men. Whilst there has, and always will be, a vocal feminine dismissal of feminist values and goals the rise of the ‘Tradwife’ is a sinister turn that rejects all feminist tenants in favour of a perceived golden age of housewifery. At a time where feminine empowerment and ambition is arguably the most achievable it’s ever been in known history, why were these women so keen to reject and denounce the hard-won achievements of feminists past?
My curiosity in this phenomenon was in part fuelled by my witnessing of the Tradwife pipeline in-action. A micro-influencer who I’d followed for years named Rohini Elyse had transformed from classic makeup influencing to homemaking and ‘divine feminine’ content on a homestead in Tennessee while she expects her first child. She had begun using hashtags such as #divinefemininerising and #maidentomother, whilst posting about her journey as a mother and becoming a housewife. On the more extreme end are the influencers who openly deride feminism, whilst others use the ‘divine feminine’ narrative in love and relationship coaching for disillusioned straight women.
In many ways we could see the rise of the divine feminine or Tradwife as a response to the once dominant (and now ‘dead’) ‘Girl Boss’ personae of social media feminism over the past decade. As pointed out by journalist Niloufar Hardari in her article on the subject, the idyllic total equality envisioned by second-wave feminism has for many felt short-lived. “We are all overworked, underpaid, and all too often under-appreciated wondering what the point of it all is” says Hadari, “why not just give up, find a wealthy man…and live happily ever after”?
Nevertheless, the rosy social media highlights of these influencers may gloss over a deeply sinister side. And whilst it is a core tenant of feminism that every woman be able to choose how she goes about her life, the core tenants of the ‘Tradwife’ are that of submission to the will of men. At the extreme, Tradwife influencers and bloggers such as Alana Pettitt of The Darling Academy advocate for women to allow their husbands full control over their lives, including their finances; the kinds of conditions which lead to the perfect conditions for domestic abuse and violence.
With the election of Donald Trump, erosion of abortion rights in the US and near-constant news of abuse has seen the glorification of harmful and archaic gender norms. Perhaps the rise of the Tradwife is symptomatic of our despondency towards the state of modern feminism. But these are the fault of the patriarchal system, and not their feminist countermovement. As stated by Hardari, the Tradwife is “both a symptom of and a reaction to the increasing insecurity of our times, but this insecurity is the fault of capitalism, not feminism”.
As I observed in my previous article, and further exemplified by the Tradwife movement, social media trends and phenomena can act as useful and detailed mirrors to the socio-political state of our modern world.
This is indeed a thought-provoking exploration of a trend that appears to be a step backward in terms of gender equality. As you mentioned, the contrast between the once-prominent “Girl Boss” era and the rise of the “Tradwife” is just like a pendulum swinging from one extreme to another. Why “Tradwife”? The allure of the “Tradwife” lifestyle, particularly in its social media portrayal, seems to be a response to the challenges and pressures of modern life. In the face of challenges and pressures of modern life, the idea of “giving up, finding a wealthy man, and living happily ever after” gains a somewhat nostalgic appeal. However, warning! The danger lies here, in the subtle undercurrents of submission and the surrender of autonomy to the will of men. The ‘Tradwife’ movement advocating women to allow their husbands full control over their lives raises red flags. It’s a reminder that, while we should have the freedom to choose our own life path, there’s a critical distinction between choice and compulsion! It is crucial to question the motivations behind such trends and to critically examine the narratives they propagate. However, these issues are rooted in the broader patriarchal system. And I do agree that the rise of the ‘Tradwife’ is not just a social media phenomenon; it’s a mirror reflecting the complexities, uncertainties, and contradictions in our contemporary socio-political landscape. We need to understand these dynamics to help us navigate the path toward a truly empowering future for all. Thanks for your blog!
I have such a morbid fascination with this kind of influencer. Have you seen any reels or tiktoks from The Ballerina Farm? Hannah Neeleman moved from New York where she was a classically trained ballerina to live on this massive rustic Utah farm where she homesteads and cooks and cleans for her family. The gag here though is that her husband is the son of the founder of JetBlue which is the only reason she’s able to support this ultra trad lifestyle. She makes all of their meals directly from their own farm ingredients(so that none of their food is tampered with or made unclean), she’s like always pregnant, and somehow manages to also homeschool all of her children. They also sell products on their website so that viewers can get closer to being the ideal tradwife. This article does a deep dive: https://thebaffler.com/salvos/land-ho-del-valle